The other day, my garbage disposal stopped working. I checked the breaker box, hit the reset button, but neither approach fixed the disposal. In the days that this problem lasted, the water wouldn’t drain from our sink and made a mess, further reinforcing my knowledge that I am not handy. In a final last-ditch effort to fix it before texting the handyman, I watched a short YouTube video and got it working in under 5 minutes with the use of a simple allen wrench. In this era of information we live in, a common experience like this might lead one to believe that you can learn how to do anything on YouTube. But you’d be wrong.
We all want to save a few bucks here and there. Attempting to save money by not hiring a divorce attorney, however, can cost us dearly if the court enters a lopsided divorce decree. Clients saddled with unfair decrees often learn too late that they fell prey to one of these FALSE beliefs: (a) their spouse would be fair; (b) placating a spouse would reduce conflict, assuage a guilty conscience, and/or be best for the children; or (c) the mediator would help the parties arrive at a proper compromise, so an attorney is not needed.
Because parties getting divorced often distrust their spouse, the first two false beliefs occur less often. On the other hand, we see the dangerous false belief re mediators all too often. Mediation is required for all divorce cases in Utah. A mediator meets with you in one room, and the other party in a separate room. The mediator helps each party exchange offers until a resolution is reached or the disagreements become insurmountable. Though a mediator usually knows the law, he/she does not represent your best interests. As a result, a mediator’s objective is not to reach a fair resolution–the mediator just wants to get a deal done.
In contrast, your attorney is a legal expert who knows you and your situation, advises you on reasonable outcomes in mediation, and provides insights regarding the alternatives to settling in mediation: “An attorney’s role in the mediation process is both as advocate and advisor to their client. It is the attorney who has prepared, investigated, discovered, and presented the case for the client.” (Brian Jerome, The Attorney, the Client and the Mediator, MEDIATE.COM EVERYTHING MEDIATION, (October 28, 2016) https://mediate.com/the-attorney-the-client-and-the-mediator.) At Millar Legal, our attorneys meet with each client before the mediation to ensure the client makes informed decisions regarding settlement during the mediation. “Mediation is about party self-determination. Hence, the role of counsel at mediation is to assist their client to obtain the best information and positive mindset possible. This will maximize the client’s expression of self-determination on process and outcome.” Harold Coleman, Jr. The REAL Role of Counsel in Mediation, AMERICAN ARBITRATION ASSOCIATION (November 30, 2020) https://www.adr.org/Mediation-Mind-Shifts/Part1/The-REAL-Role-of-Counsel-in-Mediation.
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I help people protect and enforce their rights in divorce, custody, paternity, enforcement, and modification proceedings. If you or someone you know needs help with a case, please call 801-424-5280 to schedule a consultation, or use our online scheduling tool.
